All children and young people experience anxiety, confusion, distress, and anger. Simply living in a family and having friendships are emotional matters.
It's important to remember that experiencing stress or frustration, at ordinary levels, is just as important as achievement and satisfaction. This is why you should be careful when labelling young people with “mental illness” diagnoses when it may just be part of the normal growing-up process.
The good news is that most young people overcome these challenges with the support of family, friends, and professionals. This is through having honest conversations and by developing positive wellbeing, self-regard and coping strategies.
If you do become concerned about a young person’s emotional wellbeing, there is some helpful guidance on our Emotional Coaching & Listening Skills page for opening up the conversation.
The Our Minds Matter - Mental Health Information for Parents and Carers in Fife wakelet has some helpful ideas, information and websites to help you support your children and young people's emotional wellbeing.
How can I help my child?
Talking to your child about your concerns is important because it shows you care. Before you do, you need to think about what you want to say and plan beforehand.
Some key points to remember are:
- Choose a time when you can give them your full attention. It's not ideal if you're running late for work, or your favourite TV programme is about to start.
- Short, informal chats can make a big difference - whenever and wherever they happen. Think about when you're on a regular 'taxi run' or unloading the dishwasher/doing the washing up. The distraction of the activity will make the conversation less intense.
- Be sensitive when you tell them you've noticed some changes and you're wondering if they're OK.
- Ask open questions to help them talk to you. Don't judge, or try and solve their problems. Just listening can be a great help in the first instance and wondering aloud is a great opener. “I’m wondering how you are feeling about....”.
- It is important to remember to respect that they may not want to talk to you today. By opening the conversation, they may choose to talk with you another time.
- Remember you don't have to be an expert - it's OK to not know or understand everything about mental health and emotional wellbeing.
Further guidance and support on this topic can be found on the Young Minds website.
